Friday, September 28, 2007

A letter to who else

ME! Amy gave us another writing prompt, so here goes:

Dear 17 year old Smoo,

This will be a big year for you. Yeah, it starts off a bit shaky -- what with restraining orders and all -- but I promise if just keeps getting better. You know that cutie that you have been after for the ENTIRE school year. Yeah, Jon, well he IS just that into you, but quite shy. Give the guy a break and things will turn around for the two of you soon enough (the secret here is that he actually liked you before you ever noticed him -- turns out you sat in front of him in geometry. Too bad you were too busy flirting with someone else there!). He certainly isn't "the one", but he is seriously a step in the right direction. Might be the best boyfriend you have until you meet THE ONE. He is coming... just a few years down the line.

Oh and BTW -- it IS the right decision. Be careful like you were told by The Saint, but years from now you will look back and be very happy that you waited to lose your virginity until you really were in love. Again, Jon isn't "the one", but you won't regret that choice, ever. (oh and it just so happens that "the one" is losing his viriginity at about the same time you are... weird how that happens!).

Oh and Pookie as a nickname for Jon... yeah, lose that, its pathetic.

You know those friends of yours -- the ones who have been in your life since about 6th grade. I know you think that your team members are so much more fun and exciting -- with WP and HP smoking and all, HP losing her viriginity at 13, and BW sneaking out and drinking all the time and such -- but when the chips are down (and those times are fast approaching) no matter where you are or what is going one, those friends who you have spent every day eating lunch with will be the ones there for you! (there is another life-changing friend coming down the line, but she won't arrive for another year or so... just ignore the rumors you hear about her... they are about as true as the rumors floating out there about you!).

The Saint is going to spent 30 hours in a car in a 40 hour time frame to see you achieve greatness. Cut her some slack would you. She is going to be the best friend that you never knew was always in your life. You wouldn't have gone to those lengths for her at that time you selfish little girl -- appreciate what she does for you. She is going to need your support a lot in the coming years, not your petty judgement.

Another thing -- when you go to Texas on your recruiting trip, please please please for the love of GOD stay away from the shot luge! Seriously, it is evil and you will never be able to do another shot in your life without gagging (although, actually, that isn't a bad thing at all). Yes, you will be too embarassed to ever GO to Texas for school after vomitting in technicolor and that is really too bad because the excuse you come up with -- not respecting a female coach as much as a male -- is just pathetic. But ultimately you will end up where you are supposed to be and you will always have pride in being a member of the Gator Nation.

Oh -- and once you do get to Florida remember... dating Florida football players isn't all that it is cracked up to be. That jersey of his that you will wear so proudly is going to end up being a noose around your neck that it will take years and years of therapy to resolve! I know you won't listen, so during those dark suicidal days, listen to Odie -- she is a bitch but she has your best interest at heart, somewhere deep down -- and it really does get better.

Last but not least, stop asking for a hysterectomy. Two little boys will come into your life and you will be floored by the awesomeness of them. You may not want to be a mom now -- and thank God for that, you are only 17! -- but you will thank your lucky stars every single day that you are able to become a mom.

Smoo -- much older than 17 and much wiser now!

Swiss Chicken Casserole

Some how I made it through a night alone with the boys! B has called twice to check and make sure everyone is ok... Umm, I think it was just 2 weeks ago that I had FIVE kids by myself, so if I can't handle my own two... we got problems!

Now for Friday crockpot....

1 package of stove top stuffing mix
4-6 boneless/skinless chicken breasts
4-6 slices of Swiss cheese (1 slice for each chicken breast)
1 can of reduced fat cream of mushroom soup or cream of chicken

Take 1 package of stove top stuffing mix and mix both drypackets together (most are already mixed, so don't spend time seaching for "both"). Do not add water yet. Place in a sprayed (with Pam) crockpot. Place the 4-6 boneless, skinless chicken breasts on top of the stuffing. Place the Swiss Cheese on top of the chicken and then spread the reduced fat cream of ___ soup on top of the chicken and cheese. Spread evenly. Drizzle 1 cup of warm water around the edges. Cook on low in crockpot all day.

This is another one of our favorites!

Thursday, September 27, 2007


Of the $386.83 I spent this weekend was returned. I know, I know. I shouldn't have felt guilty for shopping for myself, but I did, so back when the $70 shoes, the new jeans, another pair of shoes, a nursing bra, etc. etc. In my defense, I did keep a lot and the jeans weren't quite right anyways.

I am still debating over about $75 worth of stuff too. So yes, my entire "fall wardrobe" may come to a grand total of $65 or I may actually spend $140 on myself this year. While this doesn't amount to much in NYC spending, it is a step forward for me.

In other news... L started his speech therapy on Wed. The therapist is super sweet and L actually remained interested in her for about the first 30 minutes of the session, so that is great for a 2 year old. Hopefully he will get more and more comfortable with her and I will be able to work for a portion of that time.

Oh and back to the shopping thing... jeans? Any suggestions here?

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

The dogs...

Every once in a while I reference what I call the mangy creatures. They are our dogs. They used to be referred to as "the kids" -- then I had children, human children, and they became "the dogs". Now that I have a 2 year old and "the dogs" like to eat his toys, they have become the mangy creatures to me.

Don't worry -- they have a good life. B still calls them "the kids" and says they are "just as important and L and R" -- which I should note makes me physically ill when he says it. It doesn't matter that I do not care one iota for them because my sense of obligation to them still exists. Mainly because keeping them alive and healthy keeps B sane. I will honestly have to have him committed when his male golden dies because it WILL be that bad. I think he will mourn Sonny more than any human he has lost in recent years.

I should also note that Sonny is 10 this January! That is OLD for a golden. Yes, he could live another 5 years and very well may, but the female golden, Dixie, isn't going to make it another 2 -- she is only 8 but has had a rough life (hit by a car, tree fell on her and she is FAT -- no matter how much we walk her). As much as I don't like the dogs, I still fear their demise more than I dislike them.

Oh and L, thinks they are the greatest things ever and they are so stinking patient with him. He uses them as a jungle gym and they have never once shown any aggression to him at all. R is still not totally aware of them, but I am sure they will be just as great to R as they are to L.

So, lest you think the poor dogs don't have a good life, let me assure you -- even though I call them the mangy creatures, they are the most spoiled, pampered and loved mangy creatures out there.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Is it too much...

Is it too much to ask that

1) I have the patience to deal with L's constant whining and temper tantruming because he is only 2 and that is what 2 year olds do?
2) That you toddler not melt into a pile of tears over his brother getting a teething biscuit and not him? or purees, that L will not eat? or forcing his way onto my lap when I am nursing R? Or any 1 of a number of ways he exhibits his jealousy?
3) That I don't have to explain to another adult why allowing L leaning on the screen in the window is probably a bad bad idea (ie. concussion waiting to happen)?
4) That I actually have a consistant amount of work to do on a regular basis not lulls and lumps/dumps?
5) That my 6 month old start sleeping through the night again -- something he did regularly since 8 weeks?
6) That the LEGAL owner (that would be B) of the mangy creatures that inhabit my house actually clean up their feces so the children can play in the yard?
7) That my co-workers don't get bit by the neighbors insane dog and the neighbor just blows it off (oh tell him No!)???!!!
8) That I get paid the same amount, if not more, for doing less work and having set hours?
9) That I be cloned so I can be all things to all people -- ie. full time/devoted employee, full time/devoted wife and full time mom to each of my boys individually?

That last one was too much huh?

Ok, never mind then, I will just say it IS too much.

Oh and L is officially 22 months today! Dear God, he will be 2 soon.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Mommy guilt -- the shopping

Ok, there are a thousand ways that Mommy's feel guilty. Here are the ways I feel guilty...

I work and therefore don't spend every waking second with the boys -- guilt for NEEDING to work (I need to, B wants to -- B by the way has not an ounce of guilt about this!).
I like to be away from the boys and damn it sometimes just want to be alone -- Guilty for WANTING me time -- I should want to spend every second I have with the boys, especially since I work!!!
I got pregant with R before L was a year and my damn supply dried up, so guilt for not BFing for a year.

Now here is the most recent and troublesome -- I feel guilty for shopping for myself. My clothing is so outdated that it is ridiculous and since I have that thing called a J-O-B, I actually have to dress in something more than sweats every stinking day. So this weekend I went shopping -- with the boys mind you -- to update my wardrobe. Oh and maybe get some clothing that actually FIT.

Now, I have two HUGE piles of stuff to return. Bought it, half of it was tried on, half not, so I have stuff to go back to the Gap, Lord and Taylor and H&M. Some of it fits great, but now trying to justify $70 work shoes is making me sweat. $70 was NOTHING in my former life and now I think -- oh, a month of Gymboree for L if I return them. Of course, he isn't enrolled in gymboree and I still don't have TIME for gymboree, but hey, the thought is there.

So, help me get over my Mommy guilt because seriously, I think pants that I am holding together with rubber bands qualifies me more for what not to wear then it does for a promotion.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Chili Pasta Bake

If all you mom's out there are like me, you are looking for something easy, but relatively healthy to fill your brood. CROCKPOT!!! So Fridays will now see my favorite crockpot receipes (that and I am lazy as anything and 4 days of writing seems to be my max before I get all stress -- was that funny, entertaining, do people think I am cool??? Ya' back to that low self-esteem thing. We will be leaving this area as soon as I start getting some damn interviews!).

Also, if my math is right I can do this for more than 2 years and not run outta receipes (now THAT is scary!!).


1 1/2 lbs. lean ground beef
1 cup chopped onion
2 (14 oz.) cans tomatoes with juice, mashed
2 tsp. chili powder
1/2 tsp. dried whole oregano
8 oz. tomato juice
1 tsp. Salt
1/4 tsp. Pepper
2 cups uncooked elbow macaroni

2 cups grated Monterey Jack (or med. Cheddar) cheese

Scramble-fry ground beef in nonstick frying pan until browned. Drain well. Transfer to 3 1/2 qt. slow cooker. Add nest 8 ingredients. Stir. Cover. Cook on low for 5-7 hrs. or on HIGH for 2 1/2-3 1/2 hrs. Sprinkle cheese over top. Cook on HIGH for 10-15 min. until cheese is melted.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Am I not cool anymore???

I know there HAS to be someone out there, so comment already...

Anyways, lots of things floating through my head right now, so today is a bullet point day...
  • Job, hello, where are you??? How soon can I start doing the harassing followups? anyone??
  • The Wife -- My heart aches for her. 1st husband shot himself in front of their oldest daughter, her granddaughter in Columbia is sick, her youngest daughter is raising holy hell for her in the states and here I am thinking of taking "her babies" away from her. Every time I see L run to her or R light up when she walks in I rethink leaving NY.
  • work? -- WTF is going on. I have never been so bored in my life. Starting to worry that I will no longer have a job soon.
  • Commute -- why oh why Metro North do you insist on cancelling trains and then packing us all in like sardines. And, hey you, the obnoxious woman who sat beside me. Get the hell off your cell phone, stop fucking yell and get your shit off my knees. UUGH, you can so tell those that don't commute on a regular basis. There are RULES people.
  • Boobs -- seriously, a plugged duct? Why?
  • R -- how about some sleep dude. You are awful cute but you are actually making me rethink my stand on CIO.
  • L -- I was trying to cut your hair, not torture you. Thanks for making it sound like I was driving bamboo under your nails. CPS is so going to show up at my house soon between this and your screeching during diaper changes! Potty train already and Mama won't have to hold you down to clean your butt.
  • Pampers -- you suck. I am *this* close to replacing your ass with cloth diapers. Seriously, I am googling services TODAY!

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Therapy -- finally

L is finally set up for his speech therapy. The evaluation meeting was more than a month ago and since then I haven't heard anything. I was thinking that I needed to start harassing someone while I was in VA and lo and behold I got the call yesterday.

So L will meet his therapist next week. I was thrilled to hear that she had just come back from maternity leave. I don't know why, but it makes me think that she will be more "into" it because she also has a little one.

Fingers crossed that L soon has his little explosion of words. While he is doing better, we certainly are still behind, but any little improvement is greatly appreciated.

On a side note -- when did my baby become a little boy?!

And who is having more fun here -- B or L???

Tuesday, September 18, 2007


I am not! I came to the realization yesterday that I don't even know what is in style let alone own a stylish piece of clothing. Apparently all the "rules" that I once knew, no longer are applicable (my neighbor tells me that brown and black together are now "stylish" -- bleck! I can't get over seeing brown shoes and black pants and just thinking WRONG!!).

So I made a handy list of items that I think I NEED (Mom, are you reading... I may just have a Christmas list for you if I haven't already given you one) in order to maybe have some timeless pieces, but I would love to know what is really in style.

Because I am thinking the fleece sweatpants, ripped t-shirt and old, inside-out Gator football sweatshirt I wear every single weekend just isn't "IT".

Oh and those adorable leggings under dresses.... I remember that being so stinking comfy in 7th grade and would LOVE to wear it again... but where the hell do you find leggings and such these days?

Monday, September 17, 2007

Interview me!

Alicia posted this nifty little interview meme and since it makes for an easy entry... here goes.

The rules: Leave me a comment saying “Interview me.” I will respond by emailing you or leaving a comment with five questions. I get to pick the questions. If you don’t have a valid email address on your blog, please provide one. You will update your blog with a post containing your answers to the questions. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

1. What is one thing you said you'd never do as a parent, but changed your opinion on once you actually had kids?
Hmmm... I think it would be not letting them scream/be loud in public. When I was an idiot (pre-parent), I would think, OMG how can they let their child act like THAT in public. Now, I pretty much ignore L's temper tantrum. He threw a temper tantrum for a good 15 minutes yesterday from The Saints house to the nieces school and I just ignored it. I had about a dozen parents ask if I needed help (drag carrying L, R in a sling and Niece 3 walking with me, must of looked like I totally don't have my shit together), but what am I going to do? Reason with him... HA!!! So, off we went, him throwing his temper tantrum the whole way and as soon as we stopped walking and he saw Niece 1 and 2, the waterworks disappeared. While that makes me batshit crazy and desperately desire to swat his little tush (what, I am a bad parent because I WILL spank my kid... Puh lease!), nothing works to make it stop, so I just ignore. I will absolute leave a store if he throws a temper tantrum though because I can't stand it myself. There is nothing that I NEED that can't wait until B can take the boys.

Oh and considering when I was 18 I wanted a hysterectomy, when I was 22 I thought BF was gross and when my sister was pregnant, I said I would ask for the epidural in my 8th month... well there is a lot of stuff that I changed my mind about.

2. What inspired you to start blogging? Do you share your blog with friends and family? Why or why not?
This one is interesting -- I actually started blogging because I was pissed off at mommy boards one day (I belong to Fertility Friend and used to belong to an off site one -- actually it is run by Alicia, that is how we "met"!) and it was because of the consumer reports findings on car seats. I hate CR and needed a place to vent, so I decided to start a blog. It was something I had been thinking about and had been reading blogs for a while. I didn't think I would have enough to say to keep it going. Since this is post 101 -- guess I have enough to talk about.

Yes, people IRL (in real life) know about my blog. I am kinda an open book kind of person, so I don't mind sharing. I don't complain about B on here though and only talk about work to the extent that I talk about the Co-irker. Everyone IRL knows who the co-irker is!

3. You know you’ve done your job as a parent when your kids… (fill in the blank)
... oh I don't know. There are so many things, but when they can financially support themselves with a job they like and when they treat their wife/girlfriend (or even boyfriend -- although B refuses to believe THAT could ever happen) with kindness and respect. I am proud that L will sign "I'm sorry" when he hurts someone. Kisses his brothers boo boos and such. I like that I am raising an empathetic child and I think that is important.

4. You have a career (something I don't have.. yet!) Are you glad you chose that path in life? What is the best thing about it?
I like that I have a job that pays well and I can provide the life I want to for my family. It also pays well enough for B to do a job that he LIKES rather than one that pays the bills. I don't know if I am happy about this path. Right now I am not because I don't want to be in NY anymore and I feel as though I am stuck here because I am only licensed in NY, but I am also very lucky that I can work from home two days a week. With my job there is a lot of flexibility and ability to work from home and such. However, the biggest drawback with that is that I am NEVER out of touch with the office. Only time I "couldn't" answer the office was when I was on my honeymoon and that was only because I couldn't get a signal on my blackberry. Otherwise, I am always accessible. I was answering work questions that day after I had each of the boys.

Oh and the best thing... I get to get out of the house. If I didn't have The Wife, I may not like it so much, but I think I would lose my mind if I was a SAHM. Oh and the pay and never having to worry about paying bills is nice too!

5. And I'm recycling Sarah's question, because I just love it: Let's say there is a terrible accident and you die tonight. What embarrassing things will people find that you didn't have a chance to hide or destroy?
I honestly don't know if there is anything. As I said, i am kinda an open book and I don't embarrass easily! My house is not terribly messy -- but that is because of The Wife. Maybe it would be that BOBs I have (battery operated boyfriends), but I even my mom knows about them (she helped unpack during a move... oops). But, I Love them and they are not going anywhere, so Internet... there you have it!

Saturday, September 15, 2007

I know why...

The Saint is so skinny.

My sister is 5'4'' and 100lbs soaking wet. Yeah, she runs 10Ks and the like and I thought that is why she is so skinny.

Not so!

Attempting to do her schedule for one day is exhausting. 2 trips to school in the morning -- as Niece 1 and 2 have different drop off times, up and down the stairs of her townhouse no less than a BAZILLION times and holy hell, the woman keeps the house at 80s. I have never been so constantly hot and sweaty in all my life.

Not to mention just keeping up with the girls around the house. Oh and forget having a free moment to eat. All eating I have done has been standing over the sink shoveling into my piehole.

So, the end result, no food, constant movement and utter exhaustion -- recipe for weight loss.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Chuck E. Cheese, party of 6

That's right -- I took 5 kids to Chuck E. Cheese's by myself. All in all -- not terrible. The worst part ... getting L to leave. Niece 1 and 2 were great and spent a lot of time with L playing with him, putting him on rides and such. Niece 3 did her own thing and I floated around them all and watched and held R. This is why I want to space them apart, but then again -- party of 6 on a regular basis... Oh I don't know if I like that.

So the ugly is here:
*I* ended up with a broken wrist (long story, don't ask, but yes, it is definitely broken).
Niece 3 ended up crying.
I totally blew The Saint's schedule (although the girls only went to bed 8 minutes late -- they just listen better for me. I do rock as the Aunt -- too bad I think they listen better out of fear. I am not as nice as The Saint).
Niece 1 has what appears to be her very first yeast infection.
I apparently can't sleep in a new house -- or rather B's love for fans has gotten ME so used to white noise that I find it hard to sleep without it.

After the school run this morning I called B and said... remember that thing about 4 kids.... forget it!

Oh and when I called my parents to update them my dad said "Oh you aren't even going to be able to blog about this."

HA! Childbirth with no drugs people. I laugh at a broken wrist. (not really -- it is a totally different pain -- childbirth didn't really HURT -- this Hell yes!, but since this is the 3rd time around for breaking the same wrist, I know how to work around it.)

Thursday, September 13, 2007

B's Best Friend

How would you feel if your husband had another woman in his life?

A woman that wasn’t part of his family, but who held a sacred place in his heart?

A woman that he in fact had a “thing” for at one point in his life? (and yes, we are talking high school crush kinda thing)

You wouldn’t like it, right? Well strangely enough, B has such a person and OMG I think she is fabulous.

I should mention that BF reads this blog, so “HI” BF (everyone wave). We spent some time with her this weekend and she has been on my mind ever since and since I am always searching for blogging material…

B and BF have known each other since they were young. I believe B was about 11 when he started working on BF’s family farm and BF (and BF’s counsin) quickly led to his two first crushes. The cousin was out of the picture shortly, but BF was a constant presence in his life from that point onward. When B and I started dating, I knew there was someone out there named BF, but that is pretty much all I knew about her.

One of the first times I even had a twinge of jealousy was when I saw Dunkin Donuts stuff on B’s headboard. I asked when he got it and he said BF brought it over one morning and they had breakfast together. To say lightbulbs started going off is the under statement of the world (I should mention that B sleeps in the buff. Always has.). Anyways, shortly after that, I met BF.

I absolutely adore BF. Jealousy is gone.

While this may sound weird to anyone reading this, I love that B’s best friend is a woman (and trust me if you met any of B’s other friends, you would be thankful that this is the only one he kept from his former life). She is able to provide an insight into B that I would never have known about. B has diabetes. Juvenile diabetes. And he is still pretty much in denial about it (it has been 12 years -- long enough to come to terms with the diagnosis in my mind). B won’t talk about it. BF will and was able to provide me with insight into WHY B is so devastated by the diagnosis, other times when he has let it get out of control, etc. Some might think it is weird that I am ok with another woman telling me the ins and outs of my hubby, but you know what, I think it is more important for me to know it and less important how I come to know it. BF also has a little boy who is just a few months younger than L and who’s parenting philosophy is as close to mine as anyone else I have met. I think that has been a big factor keeping us all close and B loves the BF and I are close.

Now why am I thinking about BF so much recently -- well, as I told B while we were in Chicago this weekend -- the only reason I would move to Chicago is because of BF. B’s family wavers on how good they are to me and my boys, especially since we are the only family outside of IL, but BF never does. She talks to B regularly, talks to me regularly and bends over backwards to see us every single time we come into town. So I guess the question is -- is one person, or rather one family because BF’s husband couldn’t be more awesome either!, enough to propel a move. And not for nothing, if that is the only friend I have out there, will that be enough?

So my time with BF has thrown IL back into the mix and I started sending out my resume to all sorts of places in PA, VA and now IL again. Wish me luck. It is really overdue for us to be out of NY.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Shhhh.... It's a secret

Well, not really, but I was given the assignment to post a secret on my blog.

I have thrown around a few, but I don't know if they are real secrets or not.

1) I am applying for jobs. I don't keep it a secret that we want to get the heck out of NY, but I also applied for a job here in NY. Pretty much the ad was written and might well have said "we are looking for MomSmoo", so I had to send in my resume. The salary is more than double what I currently make and would definitely allow for the building of the second floor. And I wouldn't have to say goodbye to The Wife!

2) I think I may now want 4 kids. 4 was never a number that was even tossed into consideration. Now I think I want another 2 close in age like L and R are. The new plan is to wait another year and see what we think. Luckily the IUD is keeping me from making any rash decisions.

3) I am looking forward to spending the weekend alone with my nieces and my boys. Five kids -- all 9 and under -- is going to be a lot to deal with, but I have so many ideas of fun things that I want to do (Chuck E. Cheese, Picture People pictures, the great parks, etc.) that I am really looking forward to it. The Saint doesn't seem to think I can handle it and I don't know how much time I am really going to get with my nieces (every call I get is X is going to take Niece 1 from 3 until 7 after school, so you will only have Niece 2 and 3, etc), but I am hoping a lot. Oh and I am so not telling my office that. My co-workers think I am dreading this trip.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

The First

Today marks the first time I have been in the city on September 11 since 2001.

I talked about September 11th this weekend. When people outside of NY learn that I have working in NYC since 2000 the inevitible question is "Were you in the City on 9/11" and the inevitible answer is always, yes. Why wouldn't I have been at work that day? It was a gorgeous, cloudless day just cool enough for a jacket and just warm enough to remind you that it is only the cusp of fall.

I was more than 30 blocks from the WTCs when they fell, my sister was in her home just a few short miles from Dulles Airport and my brother was driving to Pittsburg for a meeting. 3 family members and three sites of tragedy.

My life was forever changed by September 11th, just like every other American's was. My thoughts and prayers are with the families of the victims. I hope this year brings you one step closer to healing as best as you can and closure, if that is ever possible.

Monday, September 10, 2007

The Midwest...

Dear God is that place flat.

And people are too freaking nice!

Kirsten said something about an overly nice Starbucks guy and I thought -- hee, hee, I will never have to deal with THAT. Well, that lasted until this weekend. Seriously, WHY would I want to know about someones desire to come to NY to shop and blah blah blah. Serioiusly woman, it is 6 in the morning. I have two small children in the back of my car, just give me my damn caffeine and I will be on my way to the fucking airport because apparently I didn't have enough fun on the flight TO Chicago which took .... SIX AND HALF HOURS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, thta is correct 6.5 hours, we got on the plane at 4:25 and got off the place at 10:00 Central time. Making it 11:00 East Coast time -- 4.5 hours past L's normal dinner time, 4 hours late and 3 hours past L and R's normal bedtime.

Oh and by the way -- my kids -- they are saints!!!

The lessons learned this time -- O'Hare sucks and we are totally going to Phoenix soon because L can totally handle 6 hours on a plane!

Thursday, September 6, 2007


I have always been a bit of a pessimist, so that may be where this is coming from, but do you ever look at your life and think well I am happy, but this isn't what I thought it was going to be like.

And that is both good and bad.

Well... I obviously do.

The goods:

1) I had no idea I would love being a mom as much as I did. I asked my parents for a hysterectomy for my 18th b-day because I didn't want to even CHANCE having kids or getting pregnant. I look at my kids these days and marvel at how absolutely amazing it is to be their mom. To get the look of unconditional love no matter how bad my day is.

2) The flexibility of my job. I am so lucky that I can pretty much set my own hours, come and go as I please, work from home 2 days a week, etc.

3) The Wife. Seriously, I love her and couldn't have a better set up there.

The bads:

1) I am bored at work.

2) I am resentful of what I do have to do around the house (which isn't all that much anymore because of The Wife).

3) I think I get above and beyond pissed with L's whining.

4) B, just being B, makes me nuts 90% of the time. Poor guy.

Is this the trap that we all fall into about having it all? Should I expect most of these problems? Shouldn't I be happier with my lot in life -- I mean B is a wonderful husband and a great father, so why can't I appreciate him more. L is for the most part an awesome child, why I can't I ease up on getting annoyed when he whines. And why can't I just be happy that R gave me months of good sleep and is just having issues now, rather than be annoyed that he is waking at night?

Other things that are 50-50
--My coffee these days because all of a sudden caffeine and I are no longer on good terms.
--L is half way there being potty trained. Wakes up now in the morning and after naps dry and ready to go potty.
--My boobs. I had to take some allergy meds so my current milk production is about half of what I used to produce. Not thrilled about that.
--The chance that I will get the raise I requested. Nervous about that and waiting to hear the word.

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

so big

They get so big so fast...

I got this picture today from a friend who is a professional photographer. She took it when he was 3 weeks:

And I took this one of R over the weekend:

I can't believe how big he is getting.

On a side note, R is still not sleeping well. Ever since he had hand foot and mouth he seems to have lost the ability to soothe himself back to sleep. Mommy... is.... tired!

Oh -- and if you are in DC or Northern Virginia and looking for a great photographer to work with your kid... Amanda Pagon at Apple Pie Photography!

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Miss me??

Holiday weekend/vacation week and I have been MIA -- sorry about that. Here are the developments this weekend, in bullet point

  • Friday -- L tried both Little Gym and Gymboree. Went batshit ballistic with the whole balls, basketball, bubbles, stuff at both places and the "tail" they gave him at Gymboree. We are at a loss as to which one to join -- he loved both. Decision needs to be made this week.
  • Friday -- B got off early and we did nothing that I can actually remember. Fun vacation day for us!
  • Saturday -- tried figuring out what to do with the boys. Ended up running errands instead of something fun. Attempted a trip to BRU to spend a gift card, found that we need NOTHING at all in that store. God Bless the fact we can use it at Toys R Us
  • Sunday -- outing at the zoo. L went batshit crazy again with the sea lions and the carousel. Although when the sea lions started barking he got scared. Weird, seeing as we have three dogs that in fact bark.
  • Sunday -- no nap for L. Made for an interesting evening. Spent some quality time camped out our bed with the boys. Love that. Had dinner out and had the restaurant totally in love with our "well behaved boys". We actually were told that a few times at the zoo. B and I are confused.
  • Monday -- started out with breakfast at the neighbors. Tons of fun and we may have found a "mothers helper" in the 13 year old neighbor. He was AWESOME at entertaining L. May hire him in a few weeks when we need to do the second round of canning (oh -- forgot to mention that before. B and I canned tomatoes -- tons and tons of tomatoes that the farmer in him grew -- anyone need some???).
  • Monday -- B also invited the entire neighborhood over for a BBQ, so between 1 and 6, the house was scrubbed, the office organized, the lonely refrigerator still hanging out in our living room found a home in the basement, I did all the side dishes and got a shower and got the boys ready.

All in all -- not a very restful long weekend, but it was a blast and L was still sleeping this morning at 8 when I had to leave for work.

On a much much sadder note though, we got a call Monday morning telling us that B's Uncle had suddenly passed away of an apparent heart attack. So our whole crew is heading to IL for the funeral this weekend. Please keep B's family in your thoughts. Poor Grandma P has to bury her son.