Thursday, December 6, 2007

The Wife

Everyone knows how much I love The Wife. She is great. Boys just adore her, she adores the boys, etc.

However, I am starting to understand the nanny problems others have. The Wife does these little things that just make me bat shit crazy. In the grand scheme they are nothing and I know it, but OMG does it make me insane. B reminds me all the time that my requirements for a “good” nanny were -- flexible with her hours, patient, supportive of breast feeding and therefore feeding expressed milk and most of all, loves my kids! She has everything in spades and more. She cleans the house, does the kids laundry when she sees it needs done, has been totally flexible with the whole cloth diapering thing and is an awesome cook and loves to cook for B and I too.

What does she do that makes me nuts --

Can not for the life of her put the kids clothing in the proper drawer. Puts L’s clothing in R’s room and vice versa (I always keep them and wash them separately so there is no sorting to be done). If I go looking for a pair of pants I could find it anywhere from with the bibs or PJs to with the sweaters. L’s green sheets in R’s red and tan room, etc.

Feeds R desserts for breakfast. I understand she sees mango and thinks fruit, but it says MANGO DESSERT. I have solved this by HIDING the desserts. At least I think I have solved it.
Goes through an excessive amount of milk. Seriously -- sometimes as much as 30 oz when I am pumping 20! We end up dumping 2-3 oz each day. It is heartbreaking when you see your freezer stash waning as much as mine has (500 oz when I went back to work and is currently closer to 75-100 oz!). It would be one thing if we weren’t dumping any, but to see it go down the drain breaks my heart.

Vaccums our new ceramic tile kitchen floor with a regular vaccum cleaner! What the hell -- pull out a broom woman.

Doesn’t get -- change R before feeding. Therefore he falls asleep while getting his 930 bottle and doesn’t get changed until 11am -- 4 HOURS after a new diaper was put on. This IS a big deal since he is a heavy wetter and in cloth and results in a yeast infection every damn time she does it! Happens at least once a week. Never happens when I am home with R.

But as I said, she has accepted the change to cloth without hesitation because she saw it was best for R. Feels guilty about not washing them (I won’t let her touch that with a 10 foot poll because inevitably something will be lost in translation and I can’t afford for her to inadvertently destroy my stash).

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